Ted

When the credits rolled on Ted I had two immediate thoughts:


1) That was about 20 minutes too long and...


2) That reminded me a lot of Click.


The premise of the movie is a promising one. A little boy wishes his teddy bear would come to life and it does. They grow up together and the boy, John, played by Mark Wahlberg, falls in love with a woman and has to learn to grow up. 


"So how does that remind you of Click?" asks the curious Rath's Review reader. 


Well thank you for your question reader! I shall tell you! Click is pretty notorious for being a comedy for the first 70% of the movie and it very quickly turns dramatic. In fact, I would venture to say that most people got teary eyed while watching Click. I know I did. But anyway, that's not the point. The point is that Ted is very similar. It is a comedy that turns into a drama. It may not have the emotional impact of Click, but it does have a lot of heart even if the main character doesnt technically have one. 

Ted is rated R parents. Just because there is a teddy bear
doesnt mean it's all peaches and cream. Case in point:
those are 4 hookers

Many people are curious to see if Seth Macfarlane could pull off a full length feature film. If you dont know, he is the creator of the TV show, Family Guy, a show famous for its randomness. The speculation lies in whether or not he can transfer that humor to a movie rather than a 30 minute show. I would say that he has done a pretty successful job. Ted is hilarious and even parts that I saw in the commercials I found myself laughing at in the theaters. Part of the time, jokes are fast and furious one-liners, the other part of the time they are Mark Wahlberg's facial expressions, and sometimes it's just simply the fact that there is a cursing teddy bear on screen. But despite the fact that the film has its fair share of hilariousness, there are also moments where the jokes fall utterly flat. I think I can count at least seven times where a character delivered a line that was clearly supposed to be a joke and no one laughed, not even a little bit. Talk about awkward. 

"When you hear the sound of thunder dont you get too scared
just grab your thunder buddy and say these magic words:
F**K YOU Thunder!
You can suck my d**k!
You can't get me thunder
cuz you're just God's farts (fart noise)"

A CG teddy bear humping a cash register...
Reminds me of the good ol days when I used to work at 
King Soopers

Personally, one of the most impressive parts about Ted, in my opinion, was the CG guy himself. Mark Wahlberg is great in comedy as usual (although no where close to his fantastic performance in The Other Guys) and Mila Kunis is woefully underused comically. But the way that Ted waddles through the frames and how his plushness wears over time is truly some great effects. He really does look just ridiculously cuddly. No wonder he gets all the ladies. 

I guess my final thoughts on Ted could be summed up as such. There are some really funny parts (particularly a party scene with Flash Gordon) but ultimately I was disappointed because it wasn't as funny as I had expected. But at the same time I was surprised because of the heart the movie had. I had not been expecting that. Ted might be one of the best comedies so far this year, but I'll be honest, it's still leagues behind 21 Jump Street. 

Pros:

• Overall a very funny movie. Funny scenarios, funny lines (my particular favorite being one about a turnip), and good performances by all
• Impressive CG teddy bear...he makes me want to snuggle
• Has an emotional impact and again, a lot of heart
• The main theme of growing up but still remaining a kid was done near-perfectly. Usually moral lessons dont work in comedies, but I really was intrigued by the lesson in this one

Cons:

• Some jokes fall flat on their face. The movie is not consistently funny. It has its high points and its low points
• There is a subplot about a Ted-stalker that is just horrendous. It adds about 20-30 minutes onto the movie and offers maybe one or two funny jokes. The entire ending could have been very easily restructured to not include such a poor plot point
• I would say that the film is just a tad bit disappointing, depending on your expectations. I feel like there a lot of missed opportunities joke-wise 

Rath's Review Score: 7.5/10