xXx: Return of Xander Cage

xXx: Return of Xander Cage is arguably a very unnecessary film that's many years too late and based on a franchise that, being blunt, was pretty dull to start with. 

In short, we have much better versions of these types of films out there. Mainly, and almost ironically, the best example would be the Fast and Furious franchise. It's morphed into a wild, balls-to-the-wall, family/team based series where you forget all those physics lessons you ever learned and just enjoy the ride. And lately, they've been some pretty fun rides. 

It's readily apparent that Vin Diesel, actor for the fans, by the fans, is trying to apply the same treatment to his other franchise, xXx [insert obvious porn joke here]. With Return of Xander Cage, he effectively tries to reboot this long dormant Xtreme (with a capital X!) spy franchise and apply the Fast and Furious formula to it. He gets some other stars to join him, pulls off wild, impossible stunts, and mostly forgets about a memorable plot. 

Sometimes, this is all you need from a film, and with xXx, you know exactly what you're getting. I don't see many people walking into the theater for this one and coming out either A) blown away or B) radically disappointed. It does what it's supposed to and the previously referenced formula works well here even if it's still a far cry from his "other" franchise. 

What I came away wondering though is: does the world have room for Xander Cage right now? Will it ever? Granted we don't really have any idea when our next Bond film is, but we've already got so many spies that grace our cinemas I'm not sure that xXx is necessary. Sure some others are far more forgettable (see the previous Taken films) but the big ones now range from great (John Wick) to utterly fantastic (basically anything with Ethan Hunt at this point). That shouldn't be taken into consideration when grading a lone film I suppose, but I can't help but wonder why we need this agent and this film didn't do a whole lot to make me need to see more of him. 

"So when you think I'll be in Star Wars?"
"Well, when do you think I'll be in a Marvel film?"

Ruby Rose seems right at home in action
movies like this. Hollywood, take note

Before it seems like I'm bashing the film, I'll be clear: I'm not. I particularly enjoyed it because I'm an action junkie, I like dumb stunts, and it was fairly awesome. I barely remember the previous films so, by default, this is the best in the franchise in my eyes. The first time we see our hero he falls on skis a distance so great that when he lands, his shin bones should have pretty much exited through his skull. Aside from a reminder that these types of films would make hilarious fail sketches, that's the type of thing you have to accept coming into the film. The action is wild, fairly imaginative, and absolutely impossible...but it is cool. For the most part it's edited well too which is a Godsend and results in some really well choreographed, filmed, and designed scenes. There are moments of genuine badassedry in xXx by all players, not just Cage himself. Which segues into my next point perfectly: other than a completely useless DJ as a team member, this new group he's formed is a strong one to build a new franchise off of. Diesel is clearly the leader but additions like Donnie Yen, Deepika Padukone, Ruby Rose, and Nina Dobrev all bring something special. Yen in particular proves, much like in Rogue One, that he makes almost any character interesting and his hand-to-hand scenes are stunners. Rose also comes out on top bringing her typical swagger to the team as a sniper and talented gunman. She's a bit sidelined and I think she should be a key, larger player if there should be a next film. Dobrev does well as the comic relief as the way-too-hot-to-be-a-real-nerd, Becky. She's adorable and has decent comedic timing and could become a core player in the group moving forward. There's also a pretty sweet cameo that I won't ruin, but it'll make fans happy and it was done well.

Xander Cage: spelled with an "X" because his
skeleton is also made of Adamantium

I'm going to make this a short review and my reasoning is two fold: 1) it's a busy weekend and 2) xXx will likely meet your expectations. It's a film captured accurately by its trailers and cast and while it does some things poorly, it ends up being a decent start for a potential franchise that may or may not need to exist in the first place. I for one am up for more Xander Cage, especially if this diverse, fun team is brought along, but I'd still prefer my Bonds, Wicks, Hunts, and, quite frankly, Torettos over him any day.

CONS:

• A plot so generic that I could barely tell you what happens
• Some awful special effects
• Trailers gave away almost all of the coolest scenes/stunts
• Do we need a Xander Cage in our lives?
• Feels almost too formulaic compared against the Fast and Furious franchise
• Some side characters are pointless

PROS:

• Well filmed and choreographed action contained within. Pretty imaginative too
• Diesel does well leading this franchise. It suits him
• The new team is full of winners and they should absolutely be kept around. Thumbs up for crazy diversity too
• Fun soundtrack
• Great, well timed cameo
• Leaves lots of potential for a future franchise and is a successful "reboot" as it can fairly confidently say it's the best in the series

Rath's Review Score | 6.5/10