Polar

Polar is a film that doesn't seem to have gotten all that much advertisement. 

The main reason I heard of it was from nerdy sites that I visit frequently and when I saw a stylish poster of Mads Mikkelsen as an assassin, I was pretty much already on board. Even better, it was readily accessible on Netflix.

Stranger yet was upon its release this weekend, I couldn't find a trace of it on the streaming platform. I had to actually search for it in order to get it brought up. Perhaps my specific Netflix algorithm, or them trying to hide it? Ashamed of what it might contain?

I mean this quite literally when I say that Polar may be a film that peaks and craters the hardest of any recent film in memory. I 100% can understand the awful, abysmal reviews that it's receiving and one almost does wonder if Netflix is trying to bury it. 

At one point I was almost ready to stop watching because it was just aggressively bad and weird and distasteful, all rolled into one annoying ball. Sticking with it made me feel slightly better because the film eventually does improve and the latter half in particular, while nothing super-special, is still much better than what came before it. 

Trying to discover the pattern of this film, I finally came to the conclusion that this is a film that's quality is separated into 2 parts: scenes WITH Mads Mikkelsen in them, and scenes WITHOUT. The latter are some of the worst trash I've seen since I started this site while the former create a worthwhile assassin film that, while it's no John Wick, it's mostly entertaining.

When I say trash, I'll provide a little bit of context. This is a film that, within the first 5 minutes, you see a "retiring" assassin (played by Johnny Knoxville no less) partying by his pool in Chile. A group of assassins kill him while he's being "serviced" by a female member of the assassin group and he dies with a stiff erection. Sure it's comical, but the film doubles down on this zaniness and it's graphic novel roots to the point of nausea. The time spent with this group of assassin's is mostly during the first hour where the time is split between them and catching up with Mads' Duncan Vizla. Their scenes are so f**king annoying because they're all just awful, uninteresting, one-note characters who are psychotic. Just think of a group of Harley Quinn-esque characters - male and female - and you have a general idea. Their scenes are hyper-violent for the sake of being "edgy" and over-sexualize every woman to the point of uselessness; again, all seemingly to earn the achievement of being "edgy". I've mentioned it here before but being weird for the sake of being weird is the WORST form of trying to be memorable with audiences and Polar very much exists in the shadow of other comic book films like Kingsman and Kick-Ass that were edgy in the coolest of ways.

Probably the best scene of the film and the
reason you're watching a one-man assassin film

"Casting call for dumb, over-the-top villain!"

Luckily for the sake of the film and me as an audience member (I was sincerely asking myself if writing a review of a film off just the first half was justifiable here), the film turns solely to focus on Duncan for the betterment of its tone, style, and just overall quality. Much like Wick, Polar tries to world-build a grand company of assassins and Duncan is an assassin nearing 50, which is the required age to retire. He's built up quite a pension so his company doesn't quite want that to happen. The world-building stuff is awful compared to John Wick, mostly because of the people in it, but it's an interesting and semi-amusing premise as a core plot point so I give it points for keeping things simple. In fact, outside of the look-how-weird-and-cool/weird-we-are world, Polar's plot, complete with one additional layer thanks to Vanessa Hudgens, is fun and even leads to some touching moments and reveals. 

Scenes with Mads seem slightly more tapped into making a movie with actual characters vs. shock value and he's such a capable actor that he elevates the material around him considerably. If you've watched Hannibal (TV show) or Casino Royale - or many other films - you know why he has a loyal following of fans. He's a ton of fun to watch here, rocking a heavy mustache, unafraid to get very naked while killing, and also bringing a lot of danger to the character. He's an assassin we're rooting for and his journey almost feels like its getting revenge for how awful the first half can be. Mind you this revenge is very bloody, very violent, and over the top. It's very clearly R-rated, but luckily for us the back half of the film features several wonderfully choreographed scenes of mayhem and fighting with some surprisingly decent editing. Seriously, it's like this film is made by two different people at times.

This scene features Mikkelsen. So it's actually good!

This review was one of the quickest I've ever written, all because of how shockingly wide the gaps between Polar's best and worst scenes are. It's a hard film to recommend because of the garbage you have to slog through - remember, the non-Mads scenes - in order to get to an actually entertaining second half. The creators are lucky they were able to secure someone as willing and talented as Mikkelsen because without him, the material would have drowned in its absurdness. Perhaps I've intrigued a few of you by now with this review so I'd urge you to remember that I warned you and that, if you're looking for some phenomenal one-man-band assassin action, you could always revisit the John Wick series. 

Or just fast forward through bits of this film... 

CONS

• Tries to be weird and edgy and instead achieves trashy and tasteless. There are some LEGIT AWFUL scenes in the first 40-60 minutes of this one
• Dumb world building with annoying side characters. Again, weird to be weird always = bad
• Overdoes the whole comic-book shtick, particularly in the opening scenes. "Cool" fonts, sound effects, and character introductions all clash with the other, much better, tone of the film
• Shocking how wide of gaps there are between good/bad scenes here. Makes it a difficult recommendation

PROS

• Mads Mikkelsen is the reason there are any worthwhile elements here and the back half that focuses on him almost makes you forget about all the non-Mads scenes before. Almost...
• Amusing plot concept about an assassin up for retirement being denied his final due. I liked how simple and straightforward it made everything
• Mikkelsen and Hudgen's scenes together are well acted and put forward a far better tone than what the film gives off early on
• Handful of truly awesome, bloody action scenes that nearly make the whole thing worth it. Luckily these are filmed decently well too
• Back half of film has a stylish original score. Not sure where it was in the first half

Rath's Review Score | 4/10